My (not so) Grown Up Christmas List

Heard that title before? "My grown up Christmas List" a song composed by David Foster and Linda Thompson Jenner. I heard it again when it was performed by Nina in a television show this morning. The song is really good but it is more powerful when I heard Kelly Clarkson's version. 

Do you remember me                              

I sat upon your knee

I wrote to you

With childhood fantasie

Well, I'm all grown up now

And still need help somehow

I'm not a child

But my heart still can dream

God knows that I only have one wish this Christmas and it is really not a material thing (my only grown up Christmas wish). I don't really want to make a Christmas wish list but I realized I should not stop myself from dreaming just because that one wish is not yet granted. So, let's get this started.. Hmmm. 

Before, I start my (not really) grown up Christmas list, let us recall my lists for the past three years: (Just click the year) 2008 (lots of stuff! haha), 2009 (I don't have a wish list that year, I just made a to-read lists, as a shoutout to my friends.. but I think they didn't get my shoutout lol), 2010 (*teary eyed* did I really made that short MMK blog post? haha!)

Okay so much for the past years, here's my official list (official talaga ah?!) nu na?

What do I need? What do I want? Anes na?

#1

I need to organize my life(pa deep) . I need a new planner. like Seriously?! Yes, Seriously! My "witty will save the world" planner will say byebye in a few weeks. I will really miss it. I will miss my smile whenever I read "Relaks, puso lang yan, malayo sa bituka." And that planner really helped me during my last semester in college. All things were organized with a big help of its partner "sticky notes!" 

So now, its time to search for a one "pasabog" planner. I want something "unique" but "cool" again. And then I saw this: 

Filed 2012 planner

Do you believe in love in second sight? haha! THIS Filed Planner is Loooove. The first planner that I loved (and still love) is not meant for me. :'( My bestfriend and I cannot contact the seller anymore. So, I kept searching for the right (?) one. I have to admit, I can't draw to save my life... But, I can doodle (repeat 10x)! I CAN! like draw stick boy and stick girl... with hearts, flowers and butterflies! Oh, that is lame but, still this is worth it. Instead of doodles, I can write more. Like, insert every quotes that I loved in every books, movies, tv shows or whatever that I want to write! I really have that "write until there's nothing left to write for" attitude. The planner also has a free pen bandolier. If I will have that, I don't need to carry a pencil case with me full of different colored ballpens (ang dyahe kaya nun!). I read that the planner has a monthly express tracker, something that I really need because I'm a grown up na (bet mo yun?). So, Santa Claus? Can I have this one? 

#2

Need I say more? haha BOOKS. the ultimate companion. The one who saves me whenever I'm stuck up! And I will try to increase my reading challenge for next year. I want to read 80-100 books next year. (phew!) I am 1 book away from my 60 books reading challenge and I decided to add 5 books more before the year ends. Hopefully, I can do it. I want to try every book that's why I love it whenever my friends suggest new titles. I also hope I could read more books from Filipino authors published internationally. I hope I could own all the Meg Cabot books. I really want to read Murakami's 1Q84, Dash & Lily's book of Dares by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan, Jennifer Egan's A visit from the goon squad, One Day by David Nicholls  and Jessica Zafra's The 500 people you meet in  Hell. To see more of my to read lists, you can visit my goodreads account (eto nanaman po si asumera).

#3

cute external hard disk drive

I love milk but I don't wish for it this Christmas. I want an external hard drive. At dahil maarte ako, I want it to be unconventional type like the one in the photo. HAHA! I really need this because my laptop's memory will say byebye anytime. I'm so tired of deleting my favorite movies just to have room for some new files. It is also a good storage for my favorite tv series! Yehey!

#4

waaaahhh!!

I want a dog nooow! Our tito promised to give us a puppy but the puppies all died when they were born. Super sad. We even gave names to our future puppies, Solenn  for girl and Ethan (my tita's idea, i think she thought of it because of a Korean drama wherein the guy is really handsome!) if its a boy. My kuya and I really want to train a dog. I know that they can be our stress relievers. I am on one of the darkest moments of my life so having a cute puppy that you can hug and love will be a very special present this Christmas. :)

#5

Shoes. Flats and Wedges. My flat shoes are too worn out and I need new shoes for professional purposes (ansaavvve?) I'm really hoping to have a bright future next year so I need to have awesome shoes when i start to walk the greatest walk of my life (nuto model?!). I want new clothes too, okay? :))

#6 

itouch

I said that I don't want it  because I don't need it and its too expensive. Well, I've changed. Tita got her mp3 back from me when she learned that I'm using my cellphone as an mp3. It's okay, that mp3's memory is too small. The problem is my cellphone's battery is slowly dying. And in honor for Mr. Steve Jobs, who inspired many people including me, I want to own an Apple product. keri?

#7

French Macaroons.

As much as I want to include in my wish list the "ticket to Paris/NewYork/England for whoever-wants-to-go-with-me", I know that wish would not be granted anytime soon. So, let's make it simple. I want parisian macaroons for Christmas! How come I am a Paris, France fan when I haven't even tasted their famous macaroons, yet? So, Bizu waaait for me. hehe!

#8

oooh that smile! :)

Wade Kinsella (Hart of Dixie) [now, this is a grown up wish list].

I'm singing... " all i want for Christmas is YOOOOOUUUUU... just you Wade." haha. 

He may appear to be a badass but he has a very good heart. The one who is stubborn in front of you but the one who saves you without you even knowing it. 

I need someone like this:

Zoe: She (Rose) was amazing.
Wade: well, you showed her how to be. :)

Bad thing, he is just a fictional character. Can I have Wilson Bethel instead?

#9

notebooks/ JOURNAL

New cute and unique notebooks for my collection. Those notebooks on the picture are really perfect for my collection. I know my mama would say "notebook nanaman? Ano pa bang isusulat mo, di ka na estudyante...?" All I can say is maraming marami pang dapat isulat. hehe. Write until there's nothing left to write for nga diba? parang love. Okay neeext..

#10

My next wish is something really personal. I choose to keep it to myself and God. Let's just say that if this wish will be granted, all those top 9 wishes and all my other wishes will come true. I can't say that it can be granted right away but as time goes by, it will be. 

I know that in HIS time that wish will arrive. I will never lose my faith in YOU.

Please give me strength to hold on and be strong. Give me courage to "suck it up" whenever I hear the word No or not hear anything at all.

So that's the end of my not so grown up Christmas List... Sorry for my kadaldalan! 

Keep Dreaming. ♥

P.S. The photos used for this post are not mine. I got it all from tumblr. 

The most awesome gift

I was watching TV Patrol News 3 nightss ago when they featured two sick little kids who requested for a robot and a laptop for Christmas. The little boy said "gushto ko robot yun may ilaw." and the chubby kid said "laptop (not to play games) but to chat with her mother who is an OFW.

Suddenly, I miss the little me during Christmastime, the girl who doesn't demand anything. I have my own wishes but I don't say it out loud. Any gift will do. Swear. I'm just happy to open gifts. I'm happier to see that I have a gift in my Christmas Stockings.

I don't know how I found out that Santa Claus is not true. I remember I didn't get mad and just laughed when I learned that all the gifts were bought by Tita courtesy of Mama and Papa. I even remember that Santa (hmm?) always write me a letter together with the gifts! haha.

Now, that I'm older I wish for more. I want this, I want that but I can't have it. But, beyond the material things I know that I am already a grown up. I remember when I was 16 years old, all i wished is to have a peace of mind and heart. Never mind my reason. :))

And the greatest wish is to have my Mama and Papa during Christmastime and my Birthday. I remember when Mama (first time after so many years) was here on my birthday, that was one of my happiest moments.

Eversince, I'm wishing for Papa. Do you remember when you are a kid? When you wish for a big gift? That's what I always wish for, he doesn't even have to be put in a box. I just want him, as he calls Mama to fetch him in NAIA then I would accompany her. I want that scene to happen during Christmastime. I want to have Noche Buena with Kuya, Mama, Tita and Papa. I want to sleep at Christmas Night and wake up the next day wherein my family's complete. Celebrating my birthday.

I know that would happen, not now but maybe next year? or Few years from now.

:)

Missing Childhood

The real life Barbie. :)

I went to Rustan's Alabang Town Center with my tita, this morning. We were there early that's why there's still no rush in *window* shopping. We were about to go to the 2nd floor when we heard parents laughing and telling their little girls to have a picture with "Barbie." I took this photo because tita wants me too. Maybe she'll let my pamangkins see this. When I was a little girl I have barbie dolls, alot. But I grew tired of them and decided to play with my Kuya's matchboxes :)) which is more fun. Anyway, I still like Barbie but I also like toy cars. Maybe, I was more inlove with polly pockets and "lutulutuan" things and YES! toy cars.

When I've seen the twinkling eyes of those little girls looking at Barbie, many things flash backed. Simple things can make you forget all the troubles away.

Simple Life. that's me when I was younger. Sometimes I wish I can still have the heart and mind of a little *kit* during Christmas Time. So that, I won't worry on what would I wear whenever I join events or parties. I'll just let my momma and tita decide for me. I won't be sad if I can't get the expensive things I want because when I was a kid, I never care if its expensive or whatever. Before, I don't care about cool expensive presents. I just wanted to open gifts during Christmas Eve and not to worry if that gift would be useful to me or not. Hmmm.

I miss childhood. :)

Anyway, Have a happy Christmas Season Everyone. :)